[This is a part of the Evangelization Basics Series. Have you read the other parts?]
Many people that are attracted to Catholicism are also skeptical. Misinformation, poor examples and media inaccuracy don’t help. The challenge of evangelization is removing these obstacles to faith and trust in the Church.
However, moving someone from “interested but skeptical” to “open and trusting” is not easy.
There’s a saying in business, “People don’t buy from companies, people buy from people.” The same dynamic plays out in the Church with respect to evangelization. Relationships, the people factor, are the key to success.
Here are five reasons why building relationship works for evangelization.
1. Relationships Establish Trust
By building relationships you build trust. If you establish trust, your students be more likely to believe what you say.
Someone in RCIA once told to me, “I never met any Catholics that I considered real followers of Jesus. Now that I have, I can seriously consider joining the Church.”
Connecting on a personal level makes a person receptive. It lets them know you care.
2. Relationships Build Connections to the Divine
My professor at Franciscan University, Barbara Morgan, used to say, “Catechists don’t give information, they give themselves with the truth adhering.”
Evangelization requires more than just lecturing about doctrine. It requires sharing yourself in a way that communicates the Faith to others. Relationship is the medium for the message.
The human connections you make are like a bridge, or a conduit, on which the divine connection can travel. Grace builds on nature. Connecting on a human level must come before a divine connection is possible.
3. Relationships Help You Understand Others
By getting to know someone, you get insights into their life-situation, motivation, hardships and desires. The interaction that comes from relationship helps you understand how to help that person and address their concerns.
Everyone has obstacles when they think about joining the Church. How can you address the obstacles if you don’t know what they are?
4. Relationship Facilitates Transparency
Part of building relationships involves openness about your own life. Sharing how these truths changed you will motivate change in others. If they can see it in your face, they’ll know it’s real.
5. It’s the Way Jesus and the Apostles Did It
Jesus dealt with people. He knew them. He knew their hearts, their troubles, their desires. Of course, he was God so he had a much easier time than we do. However, St. Paul did the same thing!
When you establish relationship and minister from that, you’re dealing with people. You’re not dealing with facts, doctrines, rules and laws…although those come into play. You’re dealing with people.
These are five reasons why relationship building works for evangelization. Can you add any others? List them in the comments.
[This is a part of the Evangelization Basics Series. Have you read the other parts?]
Maybe this is why relationships are so often attacked. We all have “feet of clay.” When we stumble and fall, we hurt ourselves and each other. Damaging these relationships goes a long way towards damaging ministry in general.
You know, that’s a really good point! The enemy really does attack relationships in ministry all the time doesn’t he? It must be because they are so important. Look at the Saints and all the strife they had to deal with from people who should have been their friends and supporters! It demoralizes us when people don’t affirm us…especially when we’re out on the edge already with the stuff we do in catechetical ministry.
Great insight! Thanks!
Relationships are important and powerful. I urge people not to take relationship-building lightly, though. As Spiderman’s uncle would say, “With great power comes great responsibility.”
If people go about spreading the word of God like earning another notch in their evangelical belts, they will do more harm than good. There’s nothing to gain by making people feel like they just had a one night stand with the Gospel. That shallow, tenuous relationship will likely affect their view of Jesus long after you’ve moved on to other sheep.
Meaningful relationships are custom-built, and they don’t scale well. If you are able to make 3 or 4 strong, meaningful relationships in your life, and you share the word of God as part of those relationships, you will have done enough.
To me, the point of evangelization is: don’t forget or be afraid to share the wonders of your faith as part of the meaningful relationships you do have.
I couldn’t agree more! I would never advocate being fake and making a friendship simply to try to convert someone. That is shallow and inconsiderate.
I love the way you’ve expressed this last point. Thanks for the comments!
HI Mark, I just came across this…it is wonderful. I believe so strongly that relationships are the key to evangelization and effective catechesis. It’s for this reason that part of me is skeptical about new approaches to catechesis (especially for Confirmation) that rely almost totally on video. While I believe we need quality, engaging media in our catechesis, I worry that some approaches relegate the catechist to someone who presses the PLAY button and asks a few questions while the person on fire with Christ is on film and unable to be interacted with. Any thoughts?
That’s a really good insight Joe. The video model is really taking over. I have to agree with you that in many ways it’s a negative trend. Kind of the easy way out, right? Mass produced wisdom. The personal influence of the catechist is monumental. It’s a such a vital part of the process…way more than most people think.
It’s interesting because a few weeks ago I had a conversation with a DRE about this. She was saying how well the kids respond to the Chosen video lessons. Kids are so tuned into videos that it’s become a natural way for them to learn and they seem to pay more attention to the video than the live instructor. I’ve also read about the success teachers are having with flipped classrooms where they video the lectures for students to watch at home and then have discussion and interaction with them during class time. Could this be a generational thing? Without a doubt, some use of video in the classroom is the way of the future. Just how much is the question. And, if you have the main lesson taught by video, you absolutely must have significant interaction by someone who’s qualified to interact. Perhaps that’s the biggest disadvantage of these video programs. Like you said, the catechist is not the expert anymore, they’re just the person who pushes the button. There’s no way around it though…the best option is a catechist who knows his/her stuff and can relate to the students.