[This is a part of the Evangelization Basics Series. Have you read the other parts?]
Telling personal stories is extremely effective for evangelization. It has a way of cutting through uncomfortable situations when discussing difficult subjects.
It’s also one of the hardest things to do! Most of us don’t like getting personal with people we hardly know.
Believe me, I understand. I had a hard time doing this at first. But I’m telling you, if you take a leap of faith and open up certain aspects of your life, it will pay huge benefits in your evangelization efforts.
Here’s a technique for telling personal stories I’ve found extremely helpful in dealing with tough issues among even tougher audiences.
My Story
When I started teaching catechists at the diocesan level, I did training sessions with a phenomenal public speaker. He mentored me and taught me his tricks.
Over and over again he told me I needed to include personal stories. I didn’t want to, though. I was a bit reserved and wasn’t used to opening up about my personal life. Also, I wasn’t a story teller and didn’t think I had any good stories.
He kept after me, and eventually I had to sit down and dig deep into my past. At first my stories were kind of lame, but still I saw a huge difference in how my audience engaged. They paid attention and even bought into what I was telling them. I was hooked!
The Technique
Here’s my technique:
- I share an opinion, perspective, feeling or conviction from my past the listeners can identify with in their present situation.
- Then I tell them the story of how my perspective changed.
- Finally, I tell them what a difference this new perspective made.
So, the story is about my personal journey from one perspective to the discovery of another and how that made my life better. Basically, it illustrates the action I want them to take.
An Example
I’ll give you an example. One of the hardest things I teach is sexual morality in RCIA. Talk about resistance! Nothing makes a group of adults squirm more than talking about sexual sins because almost all of them are breaking the biggies! And, they don’t want to be told they have to stop.
It just so happens that my conversion story hinges around my own rejection and eventual acceptance of Catholic sexual morality and artificial birth control. I craft the entire lesson around my own personal story of coming to believe in the Church’s teaching and deciding to quit using contraception. Along the way, I tell them all the stuff the Church deems wrong and why.
The Effect
Doing this within the context of my own journey of acceptance cuts through the negative emotions. I don’t point any fingers. I don’t tell them they’re all living in sin. However, the point is clear. By the end of the talk they know what is and what is not acceptable in the Catholic Church as far as sexual practices go.
Because I’ve been on both sides of the fence, I speak with a certain authority of experience when I say life is better on the Church’s side. The effect? It gets them thinking, “Maybe he’s right! Maybe I shouldn’t be doing this. After all, he said it didn’t bring him happiness. Perhaps I should consider what he’s saying.” Instead of objections to why the Church’s teaching is wrong or why they don’t agree with it, I get questions about my decisions.
How do you use personal stories or testimonies in your catechesis or evangelization? Have you had good success with it? Do you notice the difference? I’d love to learn about it in the comments!
[This is a part of the Evangelization Basics Series. Have you read the other parts?]
I use personal stories all the time…in fact in last week’s class I was telling this one:
http://platytera.blogspot.com/2008/10/dirty-diapers-and-opus-dei.html
You’re right though, to get maximum value the story has to be clearly related to one or more Catholic/ Christian points.
I used to teach RCIA about 8 years ago; I used to tell the class how my reading of Humanae Vitae persuaded me that my wife & I shouldn’t contracept. Stuff like that matters; students want to believe that you aren’t just talking.
That’s exactly it. That stuff matters to people. That’s a great way to look at it too–students what to believe you’re not just talking. They want to believe in you and what you’re telling them. They need the truth of Catholicism. They’re wired for it!
Thanks for the comments! BTW: that was an extremely cool story!
I don’t have any relevant catechesis or evangelization experience, but just wanted to say that I loved this post. You made me smile with the story from your own life about why others should use stories!
You caught that huh? 😉 Thanks for commenting!
Great post.
I use personal stories, too. When I was employed by the parish where I work now, initially I resolved that my catechesis would NOT involve me. Stories, yes, but not mine. Then as I prepped for my first talk given to parents of children about to receive the Sacraments of 1st Confession and 1st Holy Communion, I went to the Chapel and KNEW I had to tell a very difficult story: my return to the Church, and especially the story about my 12 year Confession.
A story that made me cry whenever I even THOUGHT about it!
I still tell that story, especially in personal meetings with those who “missed” the parent meeting – I’ve discovered those are the people usually in most need of the personal connection. Even those who are faithful and attend the big meetings sometimes contact me later for more information, and then they’re comfortable enough to reveal their own struggles, their own doubts and if they’ve been away for years, they feel free to tell me that because they know I will not condemn them.
That is an awesome story! 😉
Thanks so much for this comment! Your experience is a perfect compliment to this post.
I had the same thoughts about stories when I started too. And, I had pretty much the same experience as you when I started telling them. They are killer content and really work!
That sounds like a tough story to tell. That’s fantastic that it works so well.
I have found that sharing myself with others removes walls, I can see it in their eyes when I am talking one-on-one. Sharing my eclectic spiritual background in conversations with non-Catholics or those struggling with faith questions often positions me less as the enemy assualting their beliefs and more as a fellow traveler on the journey for Truth. And thanks for teaching us through example – yes, I caught that, too!
Oh, and I translated this from the sales language I was taught of “feel,felt, found.”
“I understand how you feel, I used to feel that way, too. What I have found is…”
That is exactly it! It makes you less of an enemy and more of a fellow traveler. Very well said! I’m glad to see you’ve found the same thing.
Thanks for the comments!
I like the way you taught us through example.
I translated what I learned in sales into a similar approach that is very effective. “Feel, felt, found.”
“I understand how you feel. I felt that way (others have felt that way. What I have found is…”
Sharing of ourselves is like giving a little gift and people usually recieve that more graciously then they recieve a lecture, huh?
This is a really good formula for sharing. I like that a lot! Thanks for posting it!
Yes, absolutely! It is like giving a gift of yourself. That is much better than getting a lecture. It helps them so much more as well.